Do not neglect your duties to the gods and the Manes. Treat your mother as God. Treat your father as God. Treat your teacher as God. Treat your guest as God. Whatever deeds are faultless, these are to be performed not others. Whatever good works have been performed by us, those should be performed by you not others.
Sri Ramakrishna Says —
A long conversation ensued about Ram’s household affairs. Ram’s father was a devout Vaishnava and worshipped Krishna daily at home. He had married a second time when Ram was quite young. Both the father and the stepmother lived with Ram at Ram’s house. But Ram was never happy with his stepmother, and this sometimes created a misunderstanding between himself and his father.
They were talking about this when Ram said, “My father has gone to the dogs!”
MASTER (to the devotees): “Did you hear that? The father has gone to the dogs and the son is all right!”
RAM: “There is no peace when my stepmother comes home. There is always some trouble or other. Our family is about to break up. So I say, let her live with her father.”
GIRINDRA (to Ram): “Why don’t you too keep your wife at her father’s home?” (Laughter.)
MASTER (smiling): “Are husband and wife like earthen pots or jars, that you may keep the pot in one place and the lid in another? Siva in one place and Sakti in another?”
RAM: “Sir, we are quite happy. But when she comes the family is broken up. If such is the case —”
MASTER: “Then build them a separate home. That will be a different thing. You will defray their monthly expenses. How worthy of worship one’s parents are! Rakhal asked me if he could take the food left on his father’s plate. ‘What do you mean?’ I said. “What have you become that you cannot?’ But it is also true that good people won’t give anyone, even a dog, the food from their plates.”
GIRINDRA: “Sir, suppose one’s parents are guilty of a terrible crime, a heinous sin?”
MASTER: “What if they are? You must not renounce your mother even if she commits adultery. The woman guru of a certain family became corrupt. The members of the family said that they would like to make the son of the guru their spiritual guide. But I said: ‘How is that? Will you accept the shoot and give up the yam? Suppose she is corrupt; still you must regard her as your Ishta. “Though my guru visits the tavern, still to me he is the holy Nityananda.”‘
“Are father and mother mere trifles? No spiritual practice will bear fruit unless they are pleased. Chaitanya was intoxicated with the love of God. Still, before taking to the monastic life, for how many days did he try to persuade his mother to give him her permission to become a monk! He said to her: “Mother, don’t worry. I shall visit you every now and then.’
(To M., reproachfully) “And let me say this to you. Your father and mother brought you up. You yourself are the father of several children. Yet you have left home with your wife. You have cheated your parents. “You have come away with your wife and children, and you feel you have become a holy man. Your father doesn’t need any money from you; otherwise I should have cried, ‘Shame on you!'”
Everybody in the room became grave and remained silent.
MASTER: “A man has certain debts to pay: his debts to the gods and rishis, and his debts to mother, father, and wife. He cannot achieve anything without paying the debt he owes to his parents. A man is indebted to his wife as well. Harish has renounced his wife and is living here. If he had left her unprovided for, then I should have called him an abominable wretch. (BG 3.11, BG 3.12, BG 3.13-14, BG 3.15, BG 3.16)
“After attaining Knowledge you will regard that very wife as the manifestation of the Divine Mother Herself. It is written in the Chandi, ‘The Goddess dwells in all beings as the Mother.’ It is She who has become your mother. (Source: Gospel of Sri Ramakrishna)