Invariably the death of a loved one becomes a turning point. At that time, seeing only darkness and hopelessness all around, people begin to think deeply about life. They realize its emptiness and transitoriness—that life ends in death and union ends in separation. Still, the tears flow as grief consumes the heart. Yet such is the law of nature that eventually the heart becomes filled by another loved one and the tears stop. Golap-ma’s unbearable grief was actually God’s grace, for in her affliction she turned to Sri Ramakrishna and her life was transformed.
Golap Sundari Devi, known as Golap-ma, was born in a brahmin family of North Calcutta, probably in the late 1840s. Her parents arranged for her marriage to a poor brahmin when she was young; but her husband died after a few years, leaving her with two small children, a son and a daughter. When Golap-ma’s son was still very young, he also died, and her mainstay in life then became her daughter, Chandi. Chandi was a charming, well-mannered girl. When she grew up, Golap-ma arranged for her marriage to Saurindra Mohan Tagore, an eminent and wealthy landlord of Calcutta. But again fate was cruel to Golap-ma. Chandi died prematurely, creating a tremendous void in her mother’s life.
Golap-ma cried and cursed herself but could find no cure for her grief. Just then Yogin-ma, a neighbour, came to her aid. Seeing Golap-ma’s terrible suffering, Yogin-ma had compassion for her and one day in 1885 took her to Sri Ramakrishna at Dakshineswar. Golap-ma later described her first meeting with the Master: “When I first went to the Master I was tormented with grief for my daughter, Chandi. Yogin took me to him. He touched my head and removed all grief from my heart. It was amazing. In a moment my mind became calm and serene. I immediately laughed like a jnani [a person endowed with spiritual knowledge]. I felt that I had come to this world to act in a play. Who is whose mother and who is whose daughter? In my childhood I had played with cloth dolls, and after that I played with flesh-and-blood dolls. This world is nothing but a play with dolls, so why should I cry for my daughter? It is a glorious thing to cry for God. Such was the power of the Master!”
After Golap-ma had unburdened her heart to Sri Ramakrishna by narrating the sad story of her life, he said in an ecstatic mood: “You are fortunate. God helps those who have no one to call their own.” Then he sang a song:
Dwell, O mind, within yourself;
Enter no other’s home.
If you but seek there, you will find
All you are searching for.
God, the true Philosopher’s Stone,
Who answers every prayer,
Lies hidden deep within your heart,
The richest gem of all.
It is said that the Master’s touch, his words, and his song soothed Golap-ma’s grieving heart and brought new hope and happiness to her life. (Source: They Lived with God)
The Holy Mother passed away on 21 July 1920, and Golap-ma lived for four years after that. She continued her service as usual, but she missed the Holy Mother. She had a little heart trouble and some minor complications, and gradually her health began to fail. One day Golap-ma told some women devotees, “Yogin died in the bright fortnight, and I shall go in the dark one.” A few days before her death she said to a monk: “It seems to me that this body will not last long. Quite often I see a girl, wearing an ochre cloth and a rudraksha garland and carrying a trident, come out of my body. Then I look at this body and it seems to be dead.” Golap-ma died at Udbodhan, the Holy Mother’s house, at 4:08 p.m. on 19 December 1924. Her body was cremated on the bank of the Ganges.
Soon after her death Dr. Bipin Ghosh came to see her, not knowing that she had passed away. Swami Saradananda said to him, “The bird has flown away.” “Could you tell me where the soul has gone?” the doctor asked. “To the Master,” replied Swami Saradananda. During her last visit to Varanasi with the Holy Mother, Golap-ma had said to the Mother: “I do not want liberation. I want you.” The Holy Mother had then replied: “You are foolish! Don’t you know that liberation is the Master’s real nature?” Golap-ma was a rare soul—full of love, devotion, purity, simplicity, unselfishness, and non-attachment. It is truly amazing how Sri Ramakrishna’s touch transformed a poor, grief-stricken widow into a dedicated saint. (Source: They Lived with God)